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Cerita 1st April


Pagi tadi otw pegi kerja, me & my husband were listening to johara pagi era. ada satu satu segmen khas with special guest lisa surihani & yusry kru. they were playing some sort of games (given a few question to know each other). kitorang pun saje je gatal2 take part dalam kereta.
    
for the 1st phase, they were asking about what is the real name of their parents. surprisingly my husband pass with flying colors while me..tau nama both in law tapi x complete..huhu my bad isn't it. don't blame me coz we are not even reach 2 years of marriage.. hehehe lame excuse  
  
for the 2nd phase, dorg tanya between both of them siapa yang akan tidur dlu. this time no doubt because my husband didnt even notice about it. me? hmm jangan cakap laa dari mula dia masuk tido sampai da bangun i could describe every single minor thing about him..
  
trust me, mende2 macam ni only wife would know..   



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Pelik yang baik

last november there was something weird happened to me
This is a good weird i think
Saya mengalami simptom muntah2 pada waktu pagi
I started to vomit when i was going back to my hometown
Mula2 tu saya ikut parents saya gi breakfast pagi
Then after breakfast saya balik rumah
Lepas tu terus muntah bila saya gosok gigi
I thought macam angin la kot and it is normal

So the next day we went to JB because my husband had a meeting
Me and my parents pun ikut and we stayed at the hotel
Again saya muntah after having a breakfast
Kali ni muntah semua skali yang makan time breakfast tu
Tiga kali berturut2 saya muntah time pagi
Aik terasa cam da pelik da ni

Then on the next day tu xde da simptom muntah2
Just rasa loya yang membuatkan saya nak muntah
Masalahnya loya tu time pagi je ek
Masuk je tengah hari saya da ok macam biasa

Simptom ni berlanjutan almost 2 weeks
Ya Allah lapa tau tapi x tau nak makan ape sbb sume mende pun rasa loya time pagi tu
Then my husband da start suspek something
I told him to wait until my next period
But dalam hati ni ya Allah, Tuhan je yang tahu

On the day yang saya patut period, period x datang lagi
Then saya buat UPT test
Berdebar rasa hati nak buat tu
Dengan terkial2 x reti
Tunggu la result, but naik 1 line je
Malas nak frust saya trus buang dalam dustbin and sambung tido balik

Pagi tu time nak pegi keje
Tergerak hati nak tgk balik
Kali ni ade dot samar kat sebelah dia
Ape niiiiiii.. i showed it to my husband ni and he said confirm da tu pregnant
Eh eh ye ye je ni so i decided tunggu je la period sambil mengharap period x kan datang

The next day period still tak datang
my husband notice my perut buncit lain macam
Tapiiii.. malam tu masa nak tido saya terasa pelik then gi check hmm period da 

Masih lagi maintain tapi pagi tu bila cakap dengan husband mula2 ok
tapi lepas tu air mata mengalir
Dia dah paham da bini dia da start jadi fragile balik
I take almost a week to face the truth
Then start la jadi normal balik
Pegi main futsal, beriye2 main
Terjatuh sume ligat gila

Then ada one day tu saya start bleeding balik but x banyak
Just a small spot
Saya macam pelik sebab takkan la period lagi
So i asked my husband to go for a checkup
After i told everything to the doctor, he said all my simptom tu and a small spot bleeding macam tanda2 yang saya gugur tapi dia x dapat nak pastikan sebab dia bukan pakar
He suggest me refer to specialist for confirmation and checkup fertility
Tapi bila checkup kat specialist doc x dapat detect bleeding tu comes from where
And after check everything alhamdulillah saya tiada apa2 masalah dalaman

But sampai sekarang, saya still confused
because when i told my frens and even my mother in law
all of them said, rasa macam ye dah tu cume x lekat panjang..
Entah la saya pun x tau nak rasa macam mane
Just that i told myself 
One day, that moment will come, insya Allah :)



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Chronology Our Own Home Sweet Home

Just for info, dulu masa dah plan untuk tunang dan kahwin, saya and my husband decide untuk beli rumah. Actually my husband insist untuk beli his own house for us. At first no need to mention la, saya nak area belah cyber/putrajaya dan dia nak area mcm cheras or something like that. Arguing pasal itu je pun yang x pernah abih. In the end saya give up sebab dia yang nak beli kan. So ikut kan je laa. Then suddenly he asked for my opinion. He said if he want to buy by his own, rasa macam loan tak lepas so he suggest to combine 2 name on it for an approval. Time ni saya agreed but i insist to choose my own area and he's ok with it. 
So starting that day, masing2 pun survey nak beli yang mane. Btw more to him sbb dia yang rajin tlg cari kan and i just say yes or no. heheh.. At last kami pilih 2 option area yang dlm our consideration in term of price, developer, square feet and macam2 lagi la.. Satu dekat area cyber and satu lagi dekat area putrajaya. Malam tu discuss and esok nya trus masing2 amik EL untuk nak tgk. Discuss pun tru ym je kott huhuh.. Oohh btw forgot to mention time tu kitorg lom bertunang pun lagi yek. Masa tu kalau tak silap bulan 9 or 10 and plan bertunang bulan 11. 

Esoknya itu kitorg pergi area cyber dlu. Survey tempat and pergi dekat office developer. Tapi kat sini dia xde rumah contoh just ada replica je. During that time, tanya la apa2 yang patut dengan sales person kat situ. Tempat dia agak terpencil and takde banyak facilities such as hospital, clinic dan kedai makan. Tapi benefit dia bagi free kitchen cabinet and 2 air cond if i'm not mistake. Price pun dalam our budget la. Saya mcm ok but my husband a bit reluctant sebab dia more think of future. Ntah kadang2 tak paham gak apa dia fikir. So i decide to call my ayah for his opinion. Ayah pun a bit reluctant when i said whose developer. So mende alah itu pun diambil kira. Then kitorg pun pegi area putrajaya lak untuk survey.  Kitorg tgk dia punya environment quite nice. Banyak facilities around it area. then bila masuk rumah contoh, Allah trus i fall in love with it. TAPIIIII ... yes ada tapi ok. Banyak yang da sold out and yang tggl pun either price dia yang macam tak masuk akal or level yg paling atas. My husband macam da ok yang ni compare to yang dekat cyber tu and he did'nt mind about level 24 pun even price dia lagi mahal dari yg cyber. No free kitchen cabinet or aircond at all. Saya pun suke tapi price dia mahal sket and xde kitchen cabinet tu sume lepas tu tingkat 24 yang paling atas kottt.. Bermula la perbincangan yg agak serious between me and my husband. kitorg duduk kat situ almost 3 hours to discuss about it. Tapi yang putrajaya ni development tak jalan pun lagi diorg baru nak rata kan tanah. Yang kat cyber tu mcm da 70% almost siap. And we did take my ayah's advise too. Ayah macam ok sebab dia cakap background developer yg ni memang ok. so discuss punya discuss, kitorg pun decide untuk booking trus sebab kalau delay nnt mesti akan terlepas lagi. Masa my husband nak bayo booking tu gile ahh perasaan mcm takut2 betul ke tak ni.  Dah la masa nak isi form tu tulis yang kitorg ni husband and wife padahal tunang pun tak lagi.. Punya la amik high risk betul. Cuba kalau x jadi kawin tak ke naya.. hehe tapi alhamdulillah kawin gak. 

So dalam agreement developement will take maximum 3 years to complete it so after kahwin tu memang kene duduk rumah sewa la dulu gamaknya. And today after 1 and half year's of marriage, our home sweet home almost complete. Probabily dalam bulan 3 tahun depan insya Allah dapat la kunci. Hope so..

Tak sabar untuk duduk rumah sendiri kan. Kita boleh suke hati untuk deco and design macam yang kita nak. Plus rumah yang kitorg sewa skrg ni, kitorg x beli sangat perabot sbb plan bila pindah rumah baru, then baru beli perabot yang btul2. So segan gak nak jemput kawan2 or sedara mara dtg rumah. Rumah cm rumah orang bujang je dengan takde sofa bagai. Alahai sedih je tgk..Biasa la org baru2 kahwin kan hehe..

So untuk orang lain yang berjinak2 nak beli rumah, semua faktor kene tgk and ambil kira. Dari segi background developer, price, benefit, facilities, square feet, markup price and many more. Macam kitorg, lebih fikir and put priority ke arah facilities, background developer, security, markup price. 

Bila tgk rumah kitorg yang hampir siap tu rasa macam ok worth it. Rasa mcm tak percaya pun ada kitorg bakal duduk rumah sendiri. Alhamdulillah..







#cantwaitourhomesweethome

2 comments

be POSITIVE



Today as usual masuk forum yang selalu masuk tu
Then bila baca komen2 yang lain masing2 announce good news
Happy for them but at the same time..
Deep down inside i feel.. DOWN

Last time when i felt down with the same reason
I cried so hard because maybe selama ni saya senyum and said i'm fine.. i'm smile.. i'm OK
That was the first time saya nangis semahu mahu nya
Kept telling myself Allah had better plan for me..

And this time, saya rasa yang sama but managed to handle it..
Masih lagi mengalir air mata tapi tidak seteruk yang dulu..
My husband keep telling me, it's ok
He will hugging me and told me it's ok.. yang still syg syg
I can't see my mak's face
i can't hear ibu's voice
I feel like i was disappointing them
Because i knew they pray for us so hard

No matter whatever reason
Saya perlu bangkit dan enjoy my life to the fullest
Because i was be surrounding with the people that love me with unconditional
Allah had better plan for me and my husband



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fragile



Fragile..
Saya rasa fragile sangat kali ni
Pantang duduk sendiri mesti suddenly dada rasa nak meletup, tekak rasa sakit then air mata pun mengalir

Down.. tipu la kalo takde rasa tu
But even camne skali pun life must go on..
Kene pegi keje.. kene tido.. kene masak.. kene makan.. kene kemas rumah as usual.. Pujuk diri sendiri tapi kadang2 kalo husband nampak saye lain macam cepat2 la dia peluk.. he knows his wife been fragile.. 

I can't see my mak's face.. ya Allah terus rasa jatuh sejatuh jatuhnya.. Wajah2 mak ayah yang paling saya sayang dalam dunia.. but they always beside me no matter what.. 0 comments